5 habits you need to get rid of to excel at what you do

Any habit good or bad is the result of repetitive actions. When you have the option of choosing or forming your habits it is important that you choose the ones which help you achieve your dreams. It is equally important to get rid of the habits which are hampering your chances to succeed.

So, here are the top 5 bad habits you need get rid of in order to improve the quality of your life and move in the right direction towards achieving your dreams.

1. Stop Complaining

"The more you complain about your problems, the more problems you will have to complain about." -Zig Ziglar

Follow these steps to avoid the habit of complaining:

1. For the next 7 days observe your language, the people or things you complain about and take a note of them.

2. Now sit down in a calm place and think whether you can do anything about the things or people you complain about.

3. If you can change the things or people you complain about, or if you can influence them directly then go ahead and work towards that change instead of complaining.

4. If your scope of influence is limited on the things which you complain about then stop worrying about them because you can do nothing about it.

5. Stop searching for excuses and start searching for opportunities. Whenever you face a problem, do not complain until you have tried out all the possible solutions.

2. Do not postpone

"Do not postpone to tomorrow if you can do it today." -Benjamin Franklin

Here is a list of things you need to do to develop habit of doing things in time:

1. First think about your goals and answer the question WHY ARE THOSE GOALS IMPORTANT TO YOU? (If you find a compelling reason to achieve your goals- you will never procrastinate your actions!)

2. Keep yourself motivated. Lack of motivation is also one of the key reasons for procrastination. Watch motivational speakers, read success stories, listen to audio books and do whatever it takes to stay motivated.

3. Ask your best friends or your parents to constantly remind you of your goals and what you are supposed to do to achieve them. Ask them to constantly check on your progress.

4. Make a list daily of top 5 things would help you to make some progress towards your goal and accomplish them.

5. Prioritize tasks according to importance. Learn to beat the dead line!

3.  Do not get addicted to distraction

"Close some doors. Not because of pride incapacity or arrogance, but simply because they no longer lead somewhere." -Paulo Coehlo

Steps to drive away distractions:

1. Check your emails and take phone calls only at a prescribed time (Maximum at 2 time slots daily).

2. Follow the habit of silent hour (Daily one hour where no interruptions are allowed) and use it to accomplish the most important task of the day.

3. Track for a day how much time you are spending on distractions at a work place or in your personal life- cell phone, internet, coffee breaks etc. Cut down all the wastages gradually.

4. Do not indulge in unnecessary gossip and do not collect information which is practically of no use to you.

5. Minimalism is one of the best ways to drive away distractions. Too many choices often confuse us and affect our decision making. Trim away excess wherever possible. 

4.  Get away from Negativity

"Do not let the noise of other people's opinions frown your inner voice." -Steve Jobs

1. Surround yourself with great people. 

2. Get rid of the relationships which add no value to your life or the relationships which are affecting you in a negative way.

Hope you remember this dialogue from the movie "The pursuit of happyness"

"Don't ever let somebody tell you you can't do something. Not even me. All right? You got a dream. You gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you you can't do it. If you want something, go get it. Period."

3. Learn to stay positive under all circumstances.

4. Develop belief in yourself, work continuously on improving yourself.

5. Stay away from the nay sayers. 

5.  Do not fear failure

"Be not afraid of anything. You will do marvellous work. The moment you fear you are nobody. Be a hero. Always say, "I have no fear". Say this to everybody "Have no fear". -Swami Vivekananda

How to get rid of fear of failure:

1. It is very important for you to realise that failure is a state of mind. You do not fail until and unless you accept failure.

2. Always think about being successful. Never let the thoughts of failure cross your mind. 

3. Have strong determination to succeed. 

Always remember these words of wisdom shared by Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

" If you fail never give up because fail means First Attempt In Learning. End is not the end, in fact End means Effort Never Dies.

If you get no as answer, remember no means Next Opportunity."

Previous Posts :

5 Steps for improving verbal communication skills

Qualities of Great Leadership defined by Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

4 steps for developing Effective Thinking skills

Get Inspired, Get Motivated and Get things done!!

5 Steps for improving verbal communication skills

“Communication is a skill that you can learn. It’s like riding a bicycle or typing.  If you’re willing to work at it, you can rapidly improve the quality of every part of your life.”

                                                                                                                                    -Brian Tracy

In this post I'm going share about steps to improve your verbal communication skills. Be it school, college or corporate industry your ability to communicate effectively will help you to get recognized and become successful. Communication skills can be classified into two categories : 

1. Verbal 2. Non-Verbal. 

Here are the 5 important steps you need follow to develop your verbal communication skills.

Step 1: Gain Command over the language

“Without language, one cannot talk to people and understand them; one cannot share their hopes and aspirations, grasp their history, appreciate their poetry, or savour their songs.”

                                                                                                                                -Nelson Mandela

Most of our communication takes place in English. So, to improve your communication skills you need to improve your language first. If you are beginner or if you are weak in the basic English grammar please refer the following books : High school English Grammar by Wren and Martin or Essential English Grammar by Raymond Murphy. If you want to improve your vocabulary please refer Word power made easy by Norman Lewis. Spend 10-15 minutes daily on exercises given in these books and you shall see a good level of improvement in your language.

Additional Tips:

•      Read regularly
•      Switch to English wherever possible
•      Communicate in English all the time
•      Try to think and Execute your thoughts in English
•      Try watching English movies and news channels

Step 2: Listen to understand

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

                                                                                                                        -Stephen. R. Covey

Studies have shown that we spend approximately half of our time in day on listening. But, the problem is most of us are poor and inefficient listeners. So, if you want to become an excellent communicator first  listen and understand what others are trying to communicate. To cultivate the habit of listening you first need to develop patience. When you carefully listen and understand what others are trying to communicate half of the work is done, What remains is only the execution of what you've listened.

Tips to hone your listening skills :

•       Take notes - because you definitely can't remember all that has been said

•       Get clarification on points which you don't understand

•       Repeat what has been said to drive away any confusion

•       Understand what has not been said (this comes from experience)

•       Before you put forth your point let the other person complete his explanation

Step 3: Organize your thoughts

“Whether you are a newspaper journalist, a lawyer, a doctor; you have to organize your thoughts.”

                                                                                                                             -Fredrick Wiseman

Clarity of expression is vital for effective communication. You can express your thoughts with clarity only when they are organized. So, go ahead and get your thoughts in order. Also, you need to have a good memory when speaking extempore. Mind mapping is a good technique that helps you remember information without creating any confusion. Another important aspect that helps in organizing your thoughts is having an in depth knowledge about the subject on which you are going to speak. So, before heading towards preparation get all your facts and figures right!

Here's how you can organize your thoughts :

•      Write down what are you going to talk and rehearse your speech, lecture or seminar 

•       Make habit of thinking before you speak ( Give appropriate answers to queries)

•      Do one thing at a time ( Do not deviate from actual topic while speaking)

•      Develop a habit of mind mapping    

Click the link below to know more about mind mapping :

 Mind mapping technique

Step 4: Develop confidence

“All the power is within you; you can do anything and everything. Believe in that; don’t believe that you are weak, stand up and express the divinity within you.”

                                                                                                                        -Swami Vivekananda

When you are confident you automatically drive your mind towards the subject on which you have to speak. You tend not to care about size of the audience, or about the panel of judges if it is a case of competition. Habits are formed by repetitive actions, so if you want make confidence as a habit, you need to practice it regularly, click the link below to read the article on how to build confidence :

10 steps to build confidence

Step 5: Learn, practice and apply

“Even today I dare not say that I've reached a state of achievement. I'm still learning, for learning is boundless.”

                                                                                                                                    -Bruce Lee

Nothing great has been achieved without sacrifice, hard work and perseverance. If you don't get it right the first time, correct your errors and go for it once again. Remember that perfection is a journey not a destination. Try to improve yourself, eliminate all the negativity around you, let all your critics be busy criticising you, do not waste your time thinking about worthless people. Concentrate on what is important and always put first things first!

Tips for continuous improvement: 

      •      Speak in front of the mirror

•      Practice simple exercises such as role play

•      Learn to Learn and Learn to unlearn

•      Set goals for self improvement

•      Check on the progress achieved

•      Plan-Do-Check-Act

"You can have ideas, but if you can't get them across, your ideas won't get you anywhere."
                                                                                    -Lee Iacocca

If you guys think there are any other factors that can help to improve verbal communication skills, please post it in the comments below!

In the next post I'd be sharing the ways to improve your non-verbal communication skills.

Previous posts :

Qualities of Great Leadership defined by Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

4 steps for developing Effective Thinking skills

Get Inspired, Get Motivated and Get things done!!

Qualities of Great Leadership defined by Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

Following are the most essential characteristics of a great leadership that were defined by Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam:

1. Must have a clear vision

Vision is the first and most important characteristic of a great  leader. Vision gives you the clarity, clarity creates awareness, awareness leads to thoughts and thoughts result in action. All the great leaders are driven by a clear and well defined purpose or a vision and they drive themselves and everyone around them towards fulfilment of that vision.

    2. Must know how to handle success and failure

" Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough."

" Don't take rest after your  first victory because if you fail in second, more lips are waiting to say that your first victory was just luck."

- Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam 

Watch Dr. Kalam explaining about how great leaders manage success and failure :

    3. Must be transparent

   " A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity"

                                                                                                            -Dalailama

*5 powerful things that happen when the leader is transparent :

1. Problems Are Solved Faster

2. Teams Are Built Easier

3. Relationships Grow Authentically

4. People Begin to Promote Trust in Their Leader

5. Higher-Levels of Performance Emerge

  4. Must have the courage to take decision

 A great leader must have the ability to assess the situation and take appropriate decision and must be ready to face the consequences of that decision. The courage to take decision can be developed by inculcating the habits of  confidence and self belief. Confidence comes from mastery and mastery is the result of continuous practice and self improvement.

    5. Must be willing to travel an unexplored path 

  " Do not go where the path may lead, instead, go where there is no path an leave a trail"                                                                                                                                                                                                  - Les Brown

The poem Road not taken by Robert Frost perfectly explains why it is important to travel an unexplored path:

   6. Must serve with integrity
   " Look for three things in a person - intelligence, energy and integrity. If they don't have the last one, don't even bother with t he first two."
                                                                                                                -Warren Buffet

          

     Integrity is the product of high moral standards, humility and honesty. To be honest with people one must be honest with oneself. Great leaders always try to bring out the best in others by constantly encouraging them and help them to improve their weaknesses, they enjoy the success of others and give credit to the people who deserve it. In short 'Great leaders create great leaders'.

   7. Must be ready to GIVE

     " Leadership is the art of giving people a platform for spreading ideas that work."

                                                                                                                    -Seth Godin

     Watch Dr. Kalam explaining about the habit of giving:

      If you guys know any other essential characteristics of great leadership kindly post it in the comment below.
  
  * Source : www.forbes.com - Click the below link to read the complete article :
     http://www.forbes.com/sites/glennllopis/2012/09/10/5-powerful-things-happen-when-a-leader-is-transparent/#2d20a6354895

     Previous post :

       4 steps for developing Effective Thinking skills

4 steps for developing Effective Thinking skills

 “Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem.

We all have 24 hours.”                  

 -Zig Ziglar

Today our lives are driven by information. Whatever information we need is available on a single click of the mouse, which leaves us with no scope for exploring different resources. Social media gives us a false impression that we are gaining knowledge, but in the real sense we are only gathering information which is absolutely of no use!

Just imagine how much we can learn if  we spend half the time that we actually spend on social media or on watching television.

Now you might ask me – Are you asking not use technology?

No, definitely not. I am asking to limit the use of technology and use it in a constructive way.

Over dependence on technology leads to distraction, wastage of time and decreases our thinking capacity. Yes you heard me right! Over usage of technology decreases our thinking capacity. 

When I say thinking capacity I am actually referring to the critical and logical thinking ability, the ability to make decisions and the ability to think effectively.When your thinking is set in the right direction, the process of learning starts automatically! And when you start applying what you've learned you’ll definitely prosper both personally and economically.

Come let us focus on how we can actually think, learn and prosper!

Here’s a small poem which describes the power of thinking. I read this poem for the first time in the book Think and grow rich by Napoleon Hill.

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but you think you can't,
It is almost a cinch that you won't.

If you think you'll lose, you're lost;
For out of the world we find
Success begins with a fellow's will
It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you're outclassed, you are;
You've got to think high to rise.
You've got to be sure of yourself before
you can ever win the prize.

Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can!

                                                - Walter D. Wintle

Following are the 4 steps you need to follow to develop effective thinking skills

1.      Have a clear vision, a burning desire or a valid purpose.

Clarity of thought is important for the generation of ideas. To be able to think clearly one needs to define one’s vision first. Once the vision or the  purpose is defined and constantly fed into the mind in the form of self suggestion and positive affirmation,  the sub conscious mind automatically starts guiding your thoughts towards the fulfilment of your vision.

.

If you've not defined your vision yet I request you do so as soon as possible.

2.      Free yourself from all the distractions.

“ An addiction to distration is the end of your creative production.”

-          Robin Sharma

Mind is always attracted to distraction, but ideas are the products of a focussed mind. Your ability to focus is directly proportional to your ability to drive away distractions. We are surrounded by a lot of junk – be it personal or professional. It is very important for us to choose from this junk the activities which take us a step closer to towards our dream and ignore the rest.

Define your problem and do not be disturbed by anything or anyone until you find a solution. So go ahead and drive away all the distractions- social network, browsing, chatting, emails, phone calls etc. and focus on what is important.

“The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus”- Bruce Lee

3.     Have Faith in your abilities.

“Faith is the head chemist of the mind. When faith is blended with thought, the subconscious mind instantly picks up the vibration. The subconscious mind then translates and transmits it to infinite intelligence.”

                                                                        - Napoleon Hill in Think and Grow rich

4.      Surround yourself with greatness.

All successful people are surrounded by great people, find great mentors and work on great ideas. As I mentioned earlier in this post we are surrounded by a lot of junk- be it information or people. Look around and try to assess your relationships and try to find out how these relationships are influencing you. Because, your thinking is highly affected by the people around you.

If the influence is positive – encouraging, motivating and inspiring then it is really important for you to hold on to such relationships. It is equally important to get away from those which are influencing you in a negative way- demotivating, distracting and wasting your time.

“ Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and the thinkers, but most of all surround yourself with those who see greatness in you, even when you don’t see it yourself”

-Edmund Lee

Hope this article will help you to find your way to effective thinking. J

(Note : Detailed posts will be written on individual factors separately)